Mittwoch, 7. November 2007

Vienna. Friday at 20:00, at the Heurigen.

Two Business men are sitting at a shop-worn table. You can recognize that both men are relaxing after a hard business day. The ties are loosening and the Armani jackets are hanging casual up the chair.

Business man No. 1 is an Austrian. The man opposite to him, business man No.2, is his business partner from New Zealand and has never seen a Heurigen before.

Business man No.1 (BM1): “Well man, I think we have made a good deal today. It was hard but fair. Let us enjoy the evening with traditionally Austrian Food and”, BM1 is coming closer to his opponent and is whispering,” Austrian drinks, of course”. He smiles.

Business man No.2(BM2) is laughing: “You be kidding. Fair!? I was a rich man, yesterday. Now, I am poor man with many things what nobody requires. I hope you will pay the bill. I can not do this anymore.”

BM1:”Of course. You are my guest tonight.”

The waiter is coming to the table and is asking: “Was darf ich den Herren kredenzen?”

BM1 (smiling):”Please in English. My guest comes from New Zealand and his German is… äh… a bit rusty.”

The waiter: ”Aha… Okay. What want the Herr from New Seeland eaten? The bloody sausage is very good, today”.

BM2(astonished): “Bloody what???”

BM1: “Black pudding. You take an intestinal from the pork and fill it with some stuff like bacon, lard, onions and other vegetables and many blood of pork. You can enjoy it as a smoked, a fried or a crude alternative.”

BM2:”Oh… I think that is not so my cup of tea or do I look like a vampire?”

BM2 is looking to the waiter: “Do you offer bloodless things, as well!?”

The waiter:” Of course. I can offer eine breadljause.”

BM2 is looking very desperate to this laughing partner.

BM1: “Different cold meat pieces, like bacon, ham and so on. It will be served with some vegetables like tomatoes, onion, horseradish and hot chilli peppers.

BM2: “This sounds nice. Or rather better as the bloody sausage.

BM1 to the waiter:”2mal Bretteljausen bitte! Für meinen Gast extra scharf.

BM1 to BM2: „What do you prefer to drink? Wine, beer, sparkling wine, water???

BM2:”Water???? First I look like a vampire. Now, I look like a horse. In New Zealand just fishes and horses would drink water!? I take a beer, one of these famous Austrian beers.

BM1:”You know, the Austrian beers are very strong and I hope you will not get a hangover tomorrow morning. You have to catch an aeroplane early in the morning.”

BM2:”Do not worry. I can sleep in the plane, let us enjoy the evening. Or better, let us have a nice night on the town.”

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